Tag Archives: perfection

What I’ve learned about trying to earn love

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I now see that a lot of my neuroses has been rooted in insecurity and fear. Not feeling secure and feeling that the burden of my safety, my life happenings, my success, my joy, everything – weighed solely on my shoulders with no other help or guidance. And all of it was life or death.

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The Practice

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Growing up, I’ve always felt like I had to change for the people in my life – myself included – to become more this or more that in order to fit in and just feel like I belonged somewhere. From family to friends, I rarely felt good enough as is.

I’m not sure if this is something that everyone experiences while growing up or if I subconsciously sought it out and manifested it into my life, but I was stuck in a loop of always trying to please everyone else. In the process of rearranging yourself to other people’s needs, it’s easy to lose sight of yourself.

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The Trap of “Tomorrow”

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“Why put off until tomorrow what you can do today?”
– an unidentified perfect human who’s magically immune to procrastination

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Perfection

“Perfect is just another way of saying ‘not finished.'”

That’s what my cousin said to me last night as she was giving me a dose of tough love when I told her I was drained and decided to bow out of completing an application for a fellowship program which was due today at noon and was an AMAZING opportunity.

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